CLASS: Conversations between Anxious and Avoidant

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CLASS: Conversations between Anxious and Avoidant

Join us for a candid conversation on the topic of Anxious & Avoidant relating, and tips to help you understand your partners and loved ones.

Paget and I have been together for almost two decades (as of 2023) and we’re happy to share the awareness, maturity, security and wisdom we’ve gained over the years in a warm conversational-style meeting.

Bring your own experience, tips, tricks, stories to the table, come share with everyone else how you failed, how you made it work, what you learned.

Each session will have a loose focus (the reality of anxious, then avoidant, then mixing the two together), but we will be happy to hold the container for any and all topics connected to attachment theory, especially if they focus on the dance of anxious and avoidant.

Read on below for logistics. The sessions are by donation (or free if this is best for you) if you find the information you get out of it useful.

Session 1 : The reality of the Anxious

Session 2: The reality of the Avoidant

Session 3: The reality of the relationship between the two

Keep in mind that this is more of a candid or "fireside" conversation with a bit of leading on our part. We hope some of it will be useful. 

If you find the conversation useful, feel free to send a donation of any amount via Venmo to @exquisiteheartlove

or PayPal to love@exquisite.love

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PODCAST: Unlocking Intimacy: The Power of Attunement In Relationships (Divine & Alive Podcast)

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PODCAST: Unlocking Intimacy: The Power of Attunement In Relationships (Divine & Alive Podcast)

Imagine being with someone who has the ability to fully take you in, to fully see you, to fully feel you, to fully *read* you such that they can move 💃 WITH YOU in every possible way: primally 🐍, somatically 🕺, emotionally ❤️, intellectually 🧠, spiritually 🕉.

What would it be like? What would it feel like?

For most, intimacy is the path to reaching the point of two beings dancers 👯 coming together to be seen and felt such that the experience is one of melding, of moving as one.

In a way, this is the relational equivalent of flow 🌊, of moving as one with another, of melding into each other's divinity.

(Click the title to read the rest)

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PODCAST: From Anxious + Avoidant Into Secure + Sovereign (Shamanic Tantra Podbast

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PODCAST: From Anxious + Avoidant Into Secure + Sovereign (Shamanic Tantra Podbast

Recently I had an incredible conversation with Holly Turiya about attachment theory and the journey to earning at secure attachment style.

As you can imagine, this journey can be long and full of challenges, and truly depends on the template of everyone’s nervous system as they grow up, and each person’s propensity to use coping mechanisms to best handle these situations.

How might the Journey to Secure look for someone with each of the main attachment styles?
Join Holly and I to find out!

Click the title to listen!

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PODCAST: 50 Shades Of YES | Conscious Consent + Dynamic Boundaries (Shamanic Tantra Podcast)

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PODCAST: 50 Shades Of YES | Conscious Consent + Dynamic Boundaries (Shamanic Tantra Podcast)

Recently I had an incredible conversation with Holly Turiya about the nature of diving into the mystery with another person via what we called a "Fifty Shades of YES" exploration.

This is, essentially, a sort of contact improv dance with other humans via different "bodies" that we express with one another:

the emotional body
the primal body
the somatic body
the intellectual body

and more!

How does this dance unfold? What are the nuggets of awareness that emerge? What is the new awareness, security, and wisdom that is gained from it?

Join me and Holly to find out!

Click the title to listen!

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PODCAST: The Journey to Secure - Creating Healthy Secure Relationships (Deeper Intimacy with Amanda Biccum)

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PODCAST: The Journey to Secure - Creating Healthy Secure Relationships (Deeper Intimacy with Amanda Biccum)

In this episode Amanda and Philippe dive deep into the landscape of attachment theory, self-regulation, self-care, sense making, and self-resourcing. They will also tackle the four stages of the journey to security which will help you reach a happy and fulfilling life. Philippe is a relationship educator and founder of Exquisite Dark Love, a platform for supporting men and women in making informed choices about relationships through the practice of connection, trust, consent, intimacy, and love.

(click the title to read more)

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VIDEO: Loving Our Tender Inner Parts with Philippe Lewis (The Self Love Show)

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VIDEO: Loving Our Tender Inner Parts with Philippe Lewis (The Self Love Show)

In this week’s Self Love Show, Philippe Lewis will teach us a simple process to reconnect with our most tender parts, allowing us to continue the process of reintegrating our past and deciphering the lessons and wisdom that has yet to be uncovered from it.

In working with clients over the years, Philippe has found that our most difficult and dysregulated moments can be linked to aspects of us that sometimes seem to "pull" away from us in an attempt to be felt and heard, and in an attempt to remind us of a past we have not fully integrated. These "parts" are often either: 

  1. The inner animal/primal, 

  2. The inner child (under 12), or 

  3. The inner teenager. 

This will no doubt be a a powerful hour as Philippe shares his knowledge on Attachment Theory, Self-Regulation, and Sovereignty. Not to be missed!

Philippe is a relationship educator. He created Exquisite Dark Love to support men and women in making better choices for themselves and each so they can become sovereign humans through the practice of connection, trust, consent, intimacy, love, and the exploration of attachment theory. He is the co-founder of ReMENber Brotherhood Journey, a coordinator with ISTA, the International School of Temple Arts, and a modern voice on critical thinking around morality and the integration of Masculine, Feminine, Dark, Light, and Shadow. Over the years, he founded the Open Relationship Community, the Attachment Community, and the Consent Community to support new emerging conversations on these important topics. He is also the happy father of a 9 year old boy who teaches him how to surrender to love and life more fully every day.

Facebook Wall: www.facebook.com/fuzzyp
Facebook Page: www.facebook.com/philippesimonlewis/

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VIDEO: Making Sense of Attachment Theory (Self-Love Show)

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VIDEO: Making Sense of Attachment Theory (Self-Love Show)

Ever been in relationship and noticed how you or your partner seemed to be following a sort of unspoken emotional “script” or “dance” leading you two down a path where triggers, difficulties, arguments, challenges, insecurities, and limitations seemed to get the best of you?

If you’ve been on this planet for long enough, you may have noticed that these patterns are more or less repeated for you and your partner. You’ve seen yourself enter these relationships again and again and again, always knowing that something is up but never quite knowing WHY.

Enters Attachment Theory, the remarkable view of relationships that seems to pretty much explain EVERYTHING about how people can be secure or insecure in relationship and how regardless of your attachment style you will likely be in relationship with people who are either.

(click the title to watch)

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VIDEO: The Awakening World by Global Peace Tribe

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VIDEO: The Awakening World by Global Peace Tribe

In this powerful edition of THE AWAKENING WORLD, we focus on MASTERING INTIMACY with Viraja Prema, Ilsa Fay, Philippe Lewis, Trish Wright & Scott Catamas.

What have been your favorite moments in life? They are almost always moments of connection: with family, friends, nature, pets. When it comes to our human relationships, our favorite moments are usually intimate times. That can include physical, emotional or spiritual intimacy.

On the other hand, most of the painful moments in life are times of separation. When trust is broken, or intimacy is not maintained with someone that we love. We get hurt and we develop “Veils of Past Pain” that impact our ability to see others (or parts of life) clearly.

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PODCAST: BDSM, attuned touch, safety and exploring the edges of your yes (Passion Poscast)

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PODCAST: BDSM, attuned touch, safety and exploring the edges of your yes (Passion Poscast)

In this rich episode Saora Love has a beautiful conversation with Phillippe Lewis about a broad array of topics. Such as touch, how to touch well, listening, consent, awareness, BDSM, pushing the edge of your yes, after care, sovereignty, polyamory/monogamy... And much more.

1:58 Who is Phillippe.

4:48 Touch… How to touch and listen well.

8:00 Understanding the polarities of feminine and masculine touch.

10:35 energetic agility… The balance of masculine and feminine, internally and externally.

13:50 How to be truly current and honest about how touch is being received.

20:27 how men can learn to trust a woman’s body as a guidance system.

22:50 what does safety feel like?

25:55 when Phillippe and Saora had a deep connection at a festival.

29:30 BDSM and pushing the edge of your yes.

33:44 Role play and the potential healing benefits.

35:25 What does Saora find exciting about BDSM and pushing the edge.

37:00 How BDSM can be an art of taking someone into a trauma state safely to have the opportunity to heal.

40:30 The importance of the way the sub is guided out.

42:40 After care.

47:20 how to cut cords/unravel energetically and return to sovereignty.

49:50 Saora’s journey with polyamory and monogamy.

53:00 Phillippe asks Saora to share her current relationship desires.

58:00 Saora shares whet she’d need in a partner now to not get distracted off her path.

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PODCAST: Play Parties, Poly, & New Paradigms (Sexualchemy Podcast)

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PODCAST: Play Parties, Poly, & New Paradigms (Sexualchemy Podcast)

Today on the show, Áine is joined by Philippe Lewis, joined by Philippe Lewis, a producer and organizer for ISTA events, and creator of Exquisite Dark Love. Philippe is here to share his experiences creating play parties that are safe, consensual, and deeper than just physical intimacy. He touches on how his childhood molded him, why burning man was a life changer, and how he mixes art with sexuality. Plus, he and Áine dive into the societal binaries behind gender and how they’re working through balancing the divine feminine and masculine in their own lives.

Listen here.

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SOVEREIGNTY: From Enabling Selfish Behavior to Responsible Empowerment: A Dynamic Conversation

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SOVEREIGNTY: From Enabling Selfish Behavior to Responsible Empowerment: A Dynamic Conversation

Five leaders in the field of relationship, all of who have extensive experience working with Alternative Lifestyles and Open Relating, have a powerful conversation about SOVEREIGNTY.

Join Bruce Lyon (founder of HIGHDEN TEMPLE), Kamala Devi (Best Selling Author & Teacher), Philippe Lewis (Beloved Coach & Mentor), Scott Catamas (Founder of the Love Coach Academy) and Trish Wright (Founder of Embodied Happiness and popular Love Coach) for this conversation.

Learn more about Bruce at www.highdentemple.org, www.brucelyon.com
Kamala Devi at hwww.KamalaDevi.com
Philippe Lewis at www.exquisitedark.love
Trish Wright at www.Embodied-happiness.com
Scott Catamas and Love Coach Academy: www.LoveCoachAcademy.com

For information on ISTA go to www.ista.life

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VIDEO: Loving Our Tender Parts (The Self-Love Show)

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VIDEO: Loving Our Tender Parts (The Self-Love Show)

In this week’s Self Love Show, Philippe Lewis will teach us a simple process to reconnect with our most tender parts, allowing us to continue the process of reintegrating our past and deciphering the lessons and wisdom that has yet to be uncovered from it.

In working with clients over the years, Philippe has found that our most difficult and dysregulated moments can be linked to aspects of us that sometimes seem to "pull" away from us in an attempt to be felt and heard, and in an attempt to remind us of a past we have not fully integrated. These "parts" are often either:

1) the inner animal/primal,
2) the inner child (under 12), or
3) the inner teenager.

This will no doubt be a powerful hour as Philippe shares his knowledge on Attachment Theory, Self-Regulation, and Sovereignty. Not to be missed!

Philippe is a relationship educator. He created Exquisite Dark Love to support men and women in making better choices for themselves and each so they can become sovereign humans through the practice of connection, trust, consent, intimacy, love, and the exploration of attachment theory. He is the co-founder of ReMENber Brotherhood Journey, a coordinator with ISTA, the International School of Temple Arts, and a modern voice on critical thinking around morality and the integration of Masculine, Feminine, Dark, Light, and Shadow. Over the years, he founded the Open Relationship Community, the Attachment Community, and the Consent Community to support new emerging conversations on these important topics. He is also the happy father of a 9 year old boy who teaches him how to surrender to love and life more fully every day.

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VIDEO: Social Media, AI & Attachment Theory (Yet Another F*ing Podcast)

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VIDEO: Social Media, AI & Attachment Theory (Yet Another F*ing Podcast)

Yet Another F*ing Podcast (EP 1)

Damien and I love having edgy, explorative conversations where we don't quite know where we are gonna end up. This is the field that we feel most inspired to play in.

In this episode we go on a fascinating tour through our relationship to social media, the AI algorithm that underlies it all, how it plays on our attachment theory, erotic energies... and more.

I LOVED this conversation. I felt so nourished by it.

Stay in beyond the first 10 minutes as we take off into the mystery!

You can contact Damien on his website.


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VIDEO: How Childhood Affects Life & Love (Alexandra Holovitz)

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VIDEO: How Childhood Affects Life & Love (Alexandra Holovitz)

Attachment Theory - How Childhood Affects Life & Love with Alexandra Holovitz

In this video, I had the pleasure of being interviewed by Alexandra on Attachment Theory - how childhood affects your life and love style, what are the main attachment styles and how to cope best in a relationship and move towards being more securely attached.

Topics discussed:

  • What is attachment theory is all about?

  • The 4 attachment style: Avoidant, Anxious, Disorganized, Secure

  • How the different attachment styles are behaving with one other?

  • How we can move more into conscious secure attachment?

  • How you can address your emotional needs in a relationship?

  • How can we define Secure Love?

  • Want to learn more about your own body?

(click the title to watch the video)

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PODCAST: A conversation on primal intelligence, consent & sovereignty (Deeper with Sophie Josephina)

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PODCAST: A conversation on primal intelligence, consent & sovereignty (Deeper with Sophie Josephina)

Deeper with Sophie Josephina (EP 3)

For this episode, Sophie is joined by Philippe Lewis - relationship educator and so much more. A deeply intelligent and wise human being, an episode filled with practical insights to feel safer and more empowered in both your feminine and your masculine. They speak about consent, primal intelligence, attachment theory and sovereign relating. He is the creator of Exquisite Love Coaching and he works with men and women to support them in making better choices for themselves and each so they can become sovereign human beings through the practice of connection, trust, consent, intimacy, love, and the exploration of attachment theory. He is also co-founder of ReMENber Brotherhood Journey, a coordinator with ISTA, the International School of Temple Arts, and a modern voice on morality and the integration of Masculine, Feminine, Dark, Light, and Shadow.

Listen to the episode here.

For more on Sophie Josephina, check out https://www.sophiejosephina.com/

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VIDEO: Secure Attachment Saturdays 2020 (Master Your Mind and Body Series)

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VIDEO: Secure Attachment Saturdays 2020 (Master Your Mind and Body Series)

Secure Attachment Saturdays

Learn more about Secure Attachment with guest expert Philippe Lewis on today's "Mind and Body Mastery Series."

In this episode of "Secure Attachment Saturdays," Mike Thomas and Philippe take you a bit deeper than week 1, exploring the developmental conditions that lead to specific attachment styles and patterns in adult relationships. As a lead-in toward a course called "The Journey To Secure," this video opens up profound inquiries related to the mystery of the human relational experience.

(click the title to see the videos)

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